Who Tied A Can On The Old Dog's Tail?
By: Mike Fitzpatrick

Written by: Mike Fitzpatrick

 
Lyrics:
Who Tied A Can On The Old Dog's Tail? [Version (a)]:

I had a dog and his name was Tray
The dog-gone dog, he ran away
Everybody listen to my tale of woe
This thing happened not so very long ago
He lived in a house on a great big hill
Where he could eat and drink his fill
An old tin can hung on a nail
And someone tied it to the old dog's tail

Who tied the can on the old dog's tail?
Did YOU tie the can on the old dog's tail?
Who made the old dog hit the trail?
Who tied the kittle on the old dog's tail?
He was a setter pup, set around all day
And you couldn't get him up
Stretched out behind the barn
Sleepin' in the sun and he didn't give a darn

Old dog Tray got an awful kick
And someone hit him with a brick
When he started bolting for the old side door
That old kittle kept a-bouncing on the floor
Oh! He ran a mile in just nothing flat
Then on the second mile, beat that
He ran and ran , let out a wail
The dog-gone can a-hangin' from his tail

Who tied the can on the old dog's tail?
Did YOU tie the can on the old dog's tail?
Who made the old dog hit the trail?
Who tied the kittle on the old dog's tail?
He had two pedigrees
Half was St. Bernard and the other Pekinese
He's found his speed, you bet
Since he's got the can, he's forgotten how to set

But that wasn't all when he reached the town
Most every thing was upside down
Sticks and stones were flying all around the street
All he needed was an extra set of feet
The baker, he fired a pumpkin pie
He hit a cop right in the eye
They all got pinched, locked up in jail
The judge said "Tell me or you'll get no bail"
 
The Song:

In order for it to feel more authentic, Beck filled out his Song Reader book with fragments of songs and melodies, as well as fictional album collections and song titles. "Who Tied A Can On The Old Dog's Tail?" can be found on the album, Hymns For Him.

While a lot of the song titles on Hymns are made-up, some are references to older sheet music/songs. This one refers to a song from 1922 called "Who Tied The Can On The Old Dog's Tail?", which seems to be about an old dog who gets hit by a brick, runs away, fed pumpkin pie, and then locked in prison. Yea.

You can see the old song here.